Eileen Lichtenstein is Your Peak Performance Success Coach for Your Life, Career and Family!
When It’s Especially Hard to Say No…
It is especially hard to say “no” to certain people. For many of us, the hardest assertiveness skill to learn is the ability to say “no” when the situation requires it. We may feel threatened by a loss of respect, love or responsibility on the job when we say “no” to someone.
If you have recently taken on additional responsibilities at the request of a colleague, loved one, or associate, then you have most likely have noticed that the addition to your regular schedule can drain you of the energy you might otherwise have used to care for yourself. Before you can recover your usual vitality, you will need to learn how to say no and discover that you have much more time to devote to pursuits that relax and nourish you. We need to ensure that we never take on too many obligations or too much responsibility by learning how to say no, without feeling guilty or distraught, to those who solicit favors from us. Often we have little free time to devote to pursuits that serve only to sustain our ongoing well-being. When we are forced to overlook these activities because we are unable to say no to others’ requests, our health and happiness can suffer.As we grow more comfortable saying no, however, we no longer feel an obligation to do all that people ask of us because we recognize that those who ask for our aid and assistance will more than likely find someone else to help them. Taking on this understanding and making an agreement with yourself to this effect will make it easier when it’s especially hard to say “no”.When you encounter difficulty with this on a regular basis, perhaps you are a “people pleaser” and may regret your actions. It is easy to learn to be assertive, not be a “people pleaser” and feel okay when you say “no”. When you are motivated to improve your self-esteem and confidence so that you can be more assertive then it can happen!
I have found EFT (emotional freedom techniques, tapping) to be an extraordinary helpful modality along with Peak Performance Success Coaching to enhance self-esteem. You may contact me for a complimentary consult . 516 623 4353