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Posts Tagged ‘Zen’

Well, for those who know me well I only complain when there’s really a point- like holiday shopping help that doesn’t know a thing about…!!
I was in a big chain store (not my fav thing:)) since there was a free deal on a great phone upgrade that I was about to pay for (at least in my Prosperity Game recent experience).


OK- so I purchased it (a few charges for a few things even though “free”) and had to leave in the middle of “syncing” with my old phone for a client meeting: they informed me I had to take the phones; I could not leave them and come back since they would not be responsible- OK- no biggie I was thinking. Later I came back gave them my syncing wares and then to my dismay over one hour and forty minutes later- had a true waiting experience in a media store with friendly and incompetent help. They synced- I was told there were 4,000 contacts syncing- no way!! and it would take a while (and I could not leave and had no laptop or reading material with me, and needless to say, no phone). So…I paced around for a while, asked many questions and then was gently guided to the reclining chairs at the big TV area. I watched a clip of Spiderman (looped) and then put in makeshift earplugs – tissues- to block out the sound of 3 football tv’s full blast behind me- and tried to relax. That didn’t last long. Later I went through a big writing pad in my bag, pulled out a few pages to follow-up with and threw out the rest. Yay! Letting go & productivity for a short time..then onto wandering and reading the backs of dvd’s and tv series I haven’t seen. I called home from their phone. I found another, quieter TV experience, that made me feel good and wonder perhaps that’s why this happened- to hear classical music and see a great scene from “Black Swan” and then a wonderful concert clip of Peter Gabriel. OK- I had my moments of Zen and was truly ready for this experience to close. My phone wasn’t ready yet. I checked with security for my lost glove; no luck. I was pacing again, and then, finally it was ready!! I had a quick tete-a tete with the very young man in charge of my operation, and he said, “this would have taken only 30 minutes if you had bought an inexpensive..SIM card. I said, “I did- it’s there-just look”. So it was, so it goes…

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The Zen philosophy of being detached from outcome may be difficult to attain when you have very real goals.

The next best thing can be change your expectations – or perhaps your perspective!

For instance:

  • A full week getaway on a tropical beach is not looking possible, so rethink it to 2 weekends away  at a lovely local resort
  • Working out five days a week isn’t happening.  Three days a week with a good buddy is entirely possible!
  • Repainting the kitchen by the end ofthe month.: Possible; hire someone!
  • Posting three times a day on all social media while moving forward on projects.  Not possible.  Get real help or an app that helps.
  • Lose ten pounds this month.  How about five?
  • Hire a coach and/or enroll in an online course to up productivity.  Doable!  Just do it:):

Related Post: 

How to Use the Zen Way of Life for Creating Peace in Your Business

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I’ve always been persistant and persevering and know these qualities have helped me follow through on projects and with  important relationships. However,  sometimes folks dont get that – or strongly disagree on issues in question (a dispute or arguement) – and call it being stubborn, inflexible, “not seeing the forest for the trees”, obsessive…The tricky part is knowing when to let  go when things  really arent working out,  making the choice to continue, restart or  toss.  Non- attachment to outcome (Zen philosophy) is as important as getting started and doing our best,  so that we can be somewhat detached and be able to  see when things aren’t worth pursuing, when it’s time to release and let go.  That can be quite challenging!  EFT (read more: http://www.balanceandpower.com/eft ) is  an enormously helpful  tool in this process.  If you need support, brainstorming-venting soundboard and exploration of your choices-prioritizing-focus issues  contact me for a FREE twenty minutes phone consultation  to find out about different coaching packages and a create a customized coaching program for you (via phone-email or face-to-face and small group sessions in Baldwin (Long Island) N.Y. ) Contact me:  eileen@balanceandpower.com   516 623 4353. 

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I’ve been viewing PBS : The Buddha”.  It’s a wonderful narrative-visual with intelligent modern people coming on to comment and Richard Gere in charge.  Interesting and not surprising that today blah-blah-blah  and I said “I’m not perfect, you know” and Mom said 1/2 in jest- “I thought you are”. Huge aha!  I’ve known  this “all along” and to have it reinforced on the same day via media is wonderful.

Being judgemental is about expecting perfection.  Being non-judgemental is the opposite.

An attitude of “expecting pefection” from anyone – even yourself- breeds judgement.
Zen philosophy teaches no expectations- detached from outcome=no judgement.

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