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Archive for the ‘Mom’ Category

If you are a mom and are struggling with negative emotions such as anger, guilt, tiredness or need help with motivation or dealing with the in-laws, this modality is for you! Even the best moms struggle with these issues. Whether your kids are toddlers or teens, this book is an ongoing tool to relieve negative emotions and enjoy your role as a mom.

Emotional Freedom Technique image008also known at EFT/ tapping is the talk of the day. This amazing new discovery is based on the body’s energies and a simple statement that the cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the energy system. It may be explained as the modern version of acupuncture without the needles and acupressure without pain, used in conjunction with peak performance success coaching.

Some of The Benefits That Emotional Freedom Technique Deals With:
Confidence and Self-Esteem ~ Stress, Anxiety ~ Anger ~ Weight Loss ~ Cravings ~ ~ ADHD, ADD ~Phobias~ Procrastination~ Communication Breakdown~ Exhaustion~ Physical Conditions

I work with individuals and present to Mother’s Groups
My Groups are being formed now in Suffolk County and Garden City, NY.
Call for a FREE CONSULT: 516 623 4353 www.balanceandpower.com

Groups for September forming NOW!

 

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I was on the airplane 3 nights ago, a return flight from European family fun and travels- and found myself contemplating how growing up in Brooklyn near Coney Island may have been a blessing in disguise-

I became fearless going on the “scary” rides even though I never would go on the parachute- there were known accidents on that one and I was very safety conscious- Mom was a worrier.

Going in the front car of the roller coaster, approaching the top (with friends of course ) and looking at the big drop ahead gave no time to do anything except scream & hold on tight! So it went through the fun summer months. Thinking back over the years, I did many courageous things and not much scared me. Here are a few that got me thinking back to the scary rides…:

•Walking on hot coals while on a mind body spirit retreat in Santa Fe ( first time away from my young children too). We had lots of prep time and when it was my turn I was ready. Awesome.

  • Skiing.This wasn’t worth it for me; injured and it could’ve been worse… Later on I took up cross country- fun!
  • Para sailing Puerto Vallarta: This was the ultimate overcome of fear of heights for me. I was sitting on the beach for several days meditating (and drinking pina coladas) and surprised myself with the conscious decision into action. Very challenging and I did look down a few times when I wasn’t looking at the mountain.
  • Riding a bicycle in Amsterdam last week.  Steve and I were visiting our daughter who lives there with her Spanish boyfriend. The city is really set up for cycling but I convinced myself it would be tough, it’s difficult enough being a pedestrian there- ‘cause of all the bicycles! My daughter went off riding with my husband and after a while came back to get me- they knew I would love it and it was only a few blocks to Vondel Park. Steve and I visited that city 40 years ago and rode our bikes around that we bought in Italy.
  • Back on the trip forty years ago- we rode our bikes out of Florence (where we bought the racers- and mine was a boy’s with the bar- the only kind made at the time) and I scared myself with a coughing attack that precipitated me throwing the pack(s) of Marlboros out- which was scary ‘cause I couldn’t imagine not smoking “cold turkey” which I succeeded at. And it was difficult- maybe not scary- to totally change our travel plans so that we went back to the city and got the bikes on trains that rode out of the seven hills, through the Alps and landed us in Germany to enjoy the rolling hills (so we could use all the gears ) and along the Rhine onto Holland. Of course we stopped to eat and sleep in foreign lands- sometimes in hostels and sometimes in the forest, scary and amazing.

I’m happy to be telling you all now. When friends and strangers comment on (both) our daughters living in Europe – I smile and am happy we brought them up with roots and wings – and the ability to navigate the scary and unknown.

• The scariest thing of all for me was 9/11 and the period following that. Were we really OK? Then it became more than me and being empty nested- yes our daughters already just in Europe- and it was much more than getting off the coach and back onto the treadmill and back into the gym- even that was scary after a dark period.

  • Now getting through the airports is kinda scary. Getting off the Long Island RR into Penn station is fine if I look straight ahead and focus. That’s it, and what I recommend:
When things get scary look straight ahead and focus. Be in the moment as much as times permit.  Be present. Be happy. Be resilient!
We’ve got the Now! Only once.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A big shout-out Thank You! to Barbara Kent, publisher of “The Long Island Corrider” magazine of the area who organized and hosted a luncheon to honor Long Island Authors and gave us the opportunity to talk about our books and lives.

 

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This is part of an inspirational-motivational poem collection used in a mindfulness based stress reduction training I attended at Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY. (circa 1995) that Dr. Jon Kabat Zinn headed up.

I find them   “food for thought” and comforting in times of uncertainty.   Rereading them and typing for this blog was a wonderful thing for me to do while Hurricane Irene is barreling up the eastern seaboard, headed for NYC and Long Island, where I live.  Uncertainty about evacuation and potential damage is difficult.  I’ve been in “Hurricane Bootcamp” with Mom in Florida during the severe/tornado before Katrina .  Now the nursing home that she resides in in Long Beach, NY may be evacuated.

 

 The Journey

One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around tou kept shouting their bad advice-

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug at your ankles.

“Mend my life!”

each voice cried.

But you didn’t stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried

with its stiff fingers

at the very foundations,

though their meloncholy was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen branches and stones.

but little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice

which you slowly recognized as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do-

determined to save

the only life you could save

-Mary Oliver, from Dreamwork

 

 

LOST

 

Stand Still.  The trees ahead and the bushes beside you

Are not lost.  Wherever you are is called Here,

And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,

Must ask permission to know it and be known.

The fprest breathes.  Listen.  It answers,

I have made this place around you,

If you leave it you may come back again, saying Here.

No two trees are the same to Raven.

No two branches are the same to Wren.

If what a tree or bush does is lost on you,

You are surely lost.  Stand still.  The forest knows

Where you are.  You must let it find you.

Arrangement by David Wagner

Cited in The Heart Aroused, by David Whyte

The Guest House

 

This being human is a guest-house

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

some momentary awareness comes

as an unexpected visiator.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,

who violently sweep your house

empty of its furniture.

Still, treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you

 out for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,

meet them at the door, laughing,

and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,

because each has been sent

 as a guide from beyond

-Say I Am You poems of Rumi

Translated by John Moyne and Coleman Barks

Maypop 1994

Love After Love

 

The time will come

when, with elation,

you will greet ypurself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror,

and each will smile at the other’s welcome

and say, sit here.  Eat.

You will love again the stranger who was yourself.

Give wine.  Give bread.  Give back your heart

to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you have ignored

for another, who knows you by heart.

Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desparate notes,

peel your own image from the mirror.

Sit.  Fest on your life.

-Derek Walcott

THE SUMMER DAY

 

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the black bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper I mean-

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I’ve been doing all day.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

From: The House of Light  – by Mary Oliver

WILD GEESE

 

You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees

for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.

You only have to let the soft animal of your body

love what it loves.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mione.

Meanwhile the world goes on.

Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebblesof the rain are moving across the landscapes,

over the prairies and the deep trees,

the mountains and the rivers.

Meanwhile, the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,

are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,

the world offers itself to your imagination,

calls you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting-

over and over announcing your place in the family of things.

From: Collected Poems -by Mary Oliver

 

Until one is committed there is always hesitancy,

the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.

concerning all acts of initiative and creation,

there is one elementary truth,

the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans; the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence

moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help that would never otherwise have occurred.

A whole stream of events issues from the decision,

raising to one’s favor all manner of unforeseen accidents and meetings

and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would come his way.

Whatever you do or dream you can, begin it.

Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.

Goethe

Balance and Power - Eileen Lichtenstein - HALF

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